Never send a man
Whose skills require
Seeing the bigger picture
To obtain anything specific
At a foreign supermarket
That is how you end up
With a reputation
As the family
Who rolled into town
And purchased two
Jumbo packs
Of incontinence pads
On the very first day
Of a two week
Holiday
Attention to detail
Was never your strongest
My dearest
That said, they proved both
Useful, well padded
And highly absorbent
So we left the remainder
In the bathroom
For the next tenants
To spare them the
Embarrassment
Of a middle-aged father
Having to ask
The Spanish word
For tampons
At least we didn’t need
Contraception
God only knows
What might have
Been the result
Water balloons?
Firecrackers?
Or merely
A tasteful calendar
Populated with
Saints days,
Helpful hints,
Thoughts, and prayers
Katherine Shirley 