The Secret Ingredient

The girl that cooks bakes cake and pies
And plays at house and tells no lies
That can’t be wriggled into line
Parading truth and saving time

The girl that cooks makes soup and stews
That chase away the taste of blues
Her kitchen hums with spitting fat
She works and cleans and strokes the cat

The girl that cooks whips up dessert
And bandages the parts that hurt
When all the world is making war
She’s tossing aubergines in flour

The girl that cooks is canny, chaste
Her sauces never go to waste
No eggs are dropped, no milk gets spilt
Her apron strings are edged with gilt

The girl that cooks with fiery flame
Whose every nuance tastes the same
Is ready with another dish
To feed you meaty, wholesome fish

The girl that cooks is clever too
She knows what suits won’t always do
When with a smirk upon your lips
You peck her brow and grip her hips

The girl that cooks in every room
Will not be left alone so soon
While every mouthful, reels you in
You’re caught within her roasting tin

The girl that cooks must take the blame
For ruining your filthy name
Enticing you with food so fair
You hung your hat and took a chair

Farewell Iron Lady

A woman we were taught as children
Was to change the world today
Has palmed us off with chains of power
Dropped her Balls and gone away

A nation stares in disbelief
The Beeb reacts with scant few lines
That multiply to meet demand
Auto-refresh on overtime

There will be drink that flows tonight
As some rejoice and some despair
The grocer’s daughter’s oversight
That closed the mines and sold the poor

Such lines as Iron Lady stood
For character, caricature
Entitled by the great and good
To whip things up and milk for more

A battleship in pussy bow
She stood her ground from thick to thin
Prime target for the satirists
Whose spitting image kept her in

What mindful public audience
That gather now for funeral cheer
Some come to cry, to jump, to dance
The Lady’s burning time draws near