Binary

Pandering to electronics
Bow to ev’ry sacred beep
Of the venerable laptop
They demand must last the week

Soothe the RAM and juggle updates
Stroke each key, a fond caress
And save your curses for the skinflint
CEO that caused this mess

Crying out for newer hardware
Staff on iPad overtime
OS struggles, RegEd nightmare
Software out of step and time

To make up shortfall in the budget
Health and Safety would think twice
And while we’re on the bloody subject
Newer desktops might be nice

We’re working hard to beat frustration
As one poor techie tries to cope
With a no-winner situation
Soldier on with little hope

She’s put the poor thing through it’s paces
Done the defrag, checked the code
Rebooted and restarted software
Not designed to get this old

So frankly it would hardly shock if
Setup takes up half the day
She’s done her best with what she’s got
But can’t do more than slow decay

The Future

One day it creeps up
With its laser-bright tech
Androids, iPads and iPods
And it’s me, me, me, next!

Me, first in the queue
For my bells and my whistles
Buying new, full price too
Grab an upgrade that sizzles

The older and wiser
Are left far behind
While the eager, hard-driver
Is blowing his mind

On fragile collectables
Soon out of date
But oh, so delectable
He just can’t wait

Get one home from the shop
And undress it with care
See your mates’ faces drop
Blank with envious stare

Why take the insurance
Of tested, tried, true
When flashy performance
Is shiny and new?

It’s progress, yeah baby!
You know that it’s fun
The future is selling
A new app to run

All manner of items
Are bought on the net
If you’ve never tried iPhones
You haven’t lived yet

Every inch of existence
Is broadcast in space
Yet we must be persistent
So we’re easy to trace

In the hope that new planets
Want to ‘friend’ us online
Drop a tweet on our twitter
To invite us to dine

At their favourite pit-stop
En-route through to Mars
Where the quaint little bipeds
Zoom ’round in their cars