Holding it

Can you make it a little further?

Just to the next bend

Almost home

Mere steps really

Cross the road

Jump the puddle

Past the bins

To the front gate

And through

Can you cross your legs

On the doormat

While I fish for keys

Elusive in pockets

Of tissues and masks

And useless pennies

That nobody takes

Anymore?

Can you keep your cool

Your calm?

Clench and unclench

Fists without disaster

Until I push the door

And you rush past the

Escaping cat

Whose plaintive mews

Mean the feeling is

Surely mutual

One in, one out

To next door’s garden

Trousers down

Flowerbed

Aaaaah… at last!

That’s better!

The Secret Ingredient

The girl that cooks bakes cake and pies
And plays at house and tells no lies
That can’t be wriggled into line
Parading truth and saving time

The girl that cooks makes soup and stews
That chase away the taste of blues
Her kitchen hums with spitting fat
She works and cleans and strokes the cat

The girl that cooks whips up dessert
And bandages the parts that hurt
When all the world is making war
She’s tossing aubergines in flour

The girl that cooks is canny, chaste
Her sauces never go to waste
No eggs are dropped, no milk gets spilt
Her apron strings are edged with gilt

The girl that cooks with fiery flame
Whose every nuance tastes the same
Is ready with another dish
To feed you meaty, wholesome fish

The girl that cooks is clever too
She knows what suits won’t always do
When with a smirk upon your lips
You peck her brow and grip her hips

The girl that cooks in every room
Will not be left alone so soon
While every mouthful, reels you in
You’re caught within her roasting tin

The girl that cooks must take the blame
For ruining your filthy name
Enticing you with food so fair
You hung your hat and took a chair

Get it together

We keep inconstant company
To care and share alike
The only things you won’t divide:
Your food, your pets, your bike.
Her lipstick’s on the headboard
His fags are on the floor
But somehow through domestic life
One tenet does endure
You always put the seat down
To keep me on my toes
So I must guess the pronoun
From the drink, the scent, the clothes