The Bathtub Pirates

I grew up in the summertime
Surrounded by the spoils of war
We hunted acorns, played at crime
And watched the adults rig our score

Competing in a healthy sense
With shared experience and chores
All piled up rocks to mend the fence
Took turns to go from ours to yours

I learned to work an Epi-pen
So Emily could come to tea
With lesser risk she’d choke upon
What passed for pranks in company

While grownups talked of higher things
Of Arts and Culture, grapes and wrath
We built a fortress, swung on swings
And sank our pirate ship – the bath

As water rose to muddy knees
The hearty pirates gave a shout
And splashing round in pants and tees
We bailed the bathroom inside out

Though life was hardly always fun
We made a joke of Physicist
Whose atom-splitting famous chum
Miscalculated bigger things

And challenged to a duel of sorts
To prove we were such clever dicks
Two minds con CERN did turn their thoughts
To problem setting cryptic tricks

The mighty sometimes need to fall
To make room for a counterpart
We kids did outperform them all
As was intended from the start

My sister won the treasure trail
The baby always did, you see
And chose a favour from the haul
To be the queen ’til half-past three

To coax ill humour to good mood
Avoid a third and bloody fight
So none would win and none could lose
A prize was found for all that night

And settled in the shade to gloat
We gulped Anne’s Grenadine and spat
Then Alex saw a spotted coat
So off we ran to find the cat

We came upon a curious scene
For kitty’d found a frog to pat
Thus rescued for our pirate queen
We bore our mascot back and sat

Beside the pond to see if he
Was well enough to take a swim
Joanna, dared by Emily
To kiss him, squealed as frog plopped in

Escaping all experiment
We gave the frog-prince lost at last
And comforted by this event
To fairytales and bed did pass